Why Routine & Free Play Are Both Important for Kids

A reflection as Sofia graduates kindergarten

This week, our oldest, Sofia, is graduating kindergarten—and I have to admit, it’s hitting me harder than I expected.

I will get to see her walk across that little stage in her cap and gown with so much pride in her steps and light in her eyes. And at the moment, I am having this flashback to her toddler years—stacking blocks in the living room, dancing in her pajamas at noon, and asking “why?” about a hundred things a day.

It reminded me how fast it all goes. But more than that, it reminded me how important those early years really are.

The routines we set.
The freedom we give them to explore.
The balance of structure and spontaneity.

All of it matters.

Why Kids Thrive on Routine

Routine isn’t about being rigid or scheduling every minute. It’s about security. When our kids know what to expect, they feel safer. They feel more confident in the world around them. From morning routines to bedtime rituals, those repeated rhythms help anchor their day.

In our home, things like a consistent bedtime, a special after-school snack, or a slow Saturday morning tradition give our girls something steady to count on—especially when life feels big or unpredictable.

Routines help with emotional regulation, too. They give kids the confidence to try new things and recover from little meltdowns faster because there’s a dependable flow to their day.

Why Free Play Is Equally Important

That said, kids also need space to be wild and curious and make up their own rules. That’s where free play comes in. It’s in those unstructured moments—building forts, pretending to be rockstars, or turning cardboard boxes into trains and cars—where their creativity and problem-solving skills really shine.

Some of my favorite memories of Sofia are of her deep in imaginative play—completely in her own world. No agenda, no learning goals. Just joy. That freedom helped her develop independence and confidence in ways I never could’ve taught through structure alone.

The Magic Is in the Balance

As we celebrate Sofia’s milestone this week, I’ve been reflecting on how we’ve tried to balance both: giving her rhythms and routines she could rely on, while also protecting time for her to just play, explore, and be a kid.

And I think that’s what helped her blossom. Not perfectly (because who’s perfect?), but meaningfully. Fully. Happily.

If you're a parent in the thick of toddler or preschool years, know this: you don’t have to choose between structure and freedom. You can do both. You should do both. Because one gives your child stability—and the other gives them wings.

From a proud, slightly teary-eyed mommy watching her little girl take on the next big chapter: You’re doing great. Keep going. It’s all adding up—even the messy, playful, seemingly ordinary days. 💛

♥️ Playfully yours, your mom-friend in fun, Lynne